Give me one of my own stories, and a time at some point after the end of the story or before the story started, and I'll write you at least 100 words of what happened then, whether it's five minutes before the story begins or ten years in the future.
OBVIOUSLY THERE IS GOING TO BE MORE TO THIS/IT KIND OF DROPS OFF IN THE MIDDLE, but i wanted to show you what i got before i head off to bed! =D
When they pull up to the diner, the cabbie follows Snafu out onto the street, turning his collar up against the rain. He shrugs as Snafu looks at him, then gestures to the flickering sign and says, “I eat, too.” He spits his gum out on the pavement. “Hell, I’ll pay, I’m feeling kinda generous. Besides, you look fucking pathetic.”
“What,” Snafu says, “You living like a big man out here driving your cab?”
He laughs, says "No," and tosses his head to the side like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t make shit.”
Snafu follows him into the diner, disregarding the “Please wait Patiently, We will be RIGHT with you!” sign propped up against the wall. They slip into a booth crowded in behind an assortment of tables and a broken drum set. The cabbie says, “Joe Liebgott,” and Snafu says, “What?”
“My name, you idiot.”
Snafu props his feet up on a chair for the table across the way. The vinyl squeaks underneath his wet boots. “Jus’ thought you knew nobody remembers that shit, ‘specially not from their cabbie.”
Liebgott ignores him and asks, “Who’re you?”
Snafu grins at him, says, “Snafu.”
Liebgott snorts. “Yeah, right,” he says.
“Hey,” Snafu replies, and spreads his hands wide. “I’m not the one who’s paying for some stranger’s dinner. Hell, I haven’t even paid fare yet.”
“Aw, shut your trap. Look,” Liebgott presses his hands onto the table. “It was the end of long day, nobody wants to be out in this damn rain and I ain’t closing for business, so I’m bored.”
“Ain’t had anybody’s ear to talk off?” Snafu gives him a slow smile. “Feelin’ lonely?”
Liebgott makes a rude gesture in his direction, and the waitress stepping around the corner rocks back on her heels and says, “Is this a bad time?” She starts to walk away, but Liebgott calls after her, “Naw, naw, hey!” and Snafu gives her his best wide-eyed innocence. She pulls at her apron and doesn’t step too close, putting on a commerical smile for Liebgott after giving Snafu a wary glance. “May I take your order?”
“Yeah,” Liebgott picks up the menu, raises his voice conversationally, “I’ll have uh, that burger? And the biggest load of fries you got. Make it freakin’ huge.”
“Coffee.” Snafu says.
Liebgott stares at him. “Seriously?” he says, “I’m offering you a free meal and all you’re gonna ask for is coffee? What the fuck are you, stupid?”
Snafu leans forward and opens his mouth, gazes at Liebgott. “Naw,” he replies. He keeps staring as Liebgott mutters something under his breath and then orders another burger, anyway. When he turns back to Snafu, he says, “What the hell are you staring at?” and Snafu shrugs, blinks real slow.
i had this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Y692d0GPQw) on repeat?
Love it, bb! How they disregard the diner sign, how from the very beginning there's the arguing and the snark, but still the concern. (Aww, Lieb, trying to force Snaf to eat.) It's just so them. I cannot wait to see what comes next. Thank you!
a lot of things liebgott does kind of translates to "come on, don't be stupid, take care of yourself or i'm gonna do it for you" even with people who he barely knows, he's just. NOT THAT GREAT ABOUT THE WHOLE TACTFUL THING. which, you know, fortunately doesn't really phase snafu (who can be kind of difficult to bicker with anyway because he doesn't always respond like he's expected to/can be unsettlingly complacent at odd moments.) but the point is = liebgott, totally a softie.
AND I AM GOING TO ENJOY WRITING MORE OF THEM. they're in cali; snafu, for a variety of reasons, decided he wanted to get as far away from where he'd been as possible, and just started heading west without a clear intention in mind (read: he was running away from everything), and, well. when he eventually ended up in california, it was as west as he could get. so he's stuck there for the moment.
i don't think i ever mentioned it before, but i love your dialogue? IT'S JUST. THE ERA AND THE FEEL OF IT, AND THE BACKDROP, all in a few words. sjfkjdk
fdfdfd thank you! i work hard on the dialogue. I SAY EVERYTHING OUT LOUD IN HORRIBLE RENDITIONS OF THE ACCENTS IN THE PRIVACY OF MY ROOM TO SEE HOW IF IT FITS. and try to pick up on people's little speech patterns, the way they talk, the emphasis they use and stuff. (like whenever i write toye, i think of his speech about joe toye day, and go off of that. or, i have this quote of babe's written down: "naww, i'm, i'm not saying he's nuts, i'm just sayin', aw, forget it. forget it! aw come'on, you've seen him bill, he's all [flustered]-- wound up like a spring!" that i can hear his voice whenever i read it.
ANYWAY POINT IS, I FIND THE WAY PEOPLE SPEAK/MAKING IT SOUND LIKE GENUINE DIALOGUE REALLY IMPORTANT/SIGNIFICANT TO A CHARACTER.
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snafu/liebgott
i had this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Y692d0GPQw) on repeat?
Re: snafu/liebgott
And that is a damn good song.
Re: snafu/liebgott
AND I AM GOING TO ENJOY WRITING MORE OF THEM. they're in cali; snafu, for a variety of reasons, decided he wanted to get as far away from where he'd been as possible, and just started heading west without a clear intention in mind (read: he was running away from everything), and, well. when he eventually ended up in california, it was as west as he could get. so he's stuck there for the moment.
Re: snafu/liebgott
Re: snafu/liebgott
ANYWAY POINT IS, I FIND THE WAY PEOPLE SPEAK/MAKING IT SOUND LIKE GENUINE DIALOGUE REALLY IMPORTANT/SIGNIFICANT TO A CHARACTER.
tl;dr TY BB ♥